Writing Tips
Do you have to write a personal essay for a scholarship or program? Do you need help with your UC's Personal Insight Questions?
Take a look at these resources to help guide your writing process, and remember to ask a teacher, Advisor or Counselor to help you proofread it.
In addition to your coursework, grade point average (GPA), and your extracurriculars, some colleges require you to submit a personal essay (or "Personal Insight Questions" for UC schools). This is a great opportunity for you to showcase who you are, what you've accomplished, what you've overcome, and what you hope to accomplish in the future.
The Writing Formula
By Anwar Shariff, SDSU Talent Search Advisor
1
Conflict
(This is what happened)
This relates to the actual event or incident that you have chosen to illustrate in your response. The incident/event should be drawn from an experience in your life that actually happened to you. The incident/event should also be strong enough that you can write a lot on the topic.
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Who?, What?, When?, Where?, Why?, How?
4
Analysis
(This is what I think about the entire situation/theme and beyond)
It is important that you be able to analyze your own experience and how it fits into the larger spectrum of your life/life goals. Providing an analysis of your experience allows you to zoom out and consider some of the larger themes of your life such as college major, career, identities, or society. It is your opportunity to relate what happened to you personally to some larger themes or ideas of life.
How does this incident/event relate to larger themes or lessons of your life?
How does it relate to your future?
How might it influence the choices you make moving forward?
2
Your Approach or Achievement
(These were my actions and these were the results)
The value of your incident/event is determined by you, and should explain what you actually did. Your actions/steps should reflect value both to your life and your decision to pursue a college education. List them in steps: (First I ...Then I .. And finally I …)
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How did you respond? Why?
What choice/s did you have to make?
What were the steps you took?
Why is this incident/event significant to your application?
5
Practice!
(This is what happened)
The most important part about writing your college essays is the practice. It’s not about writing your college essays, it’s about rewriting them! You will need a lot of practice to adequately tell your stories, so this writing intensive is designed to allow for that by use of the formula provided.
3
Insight About Your Actions
(This is what I think about what I did)
Insight refers to explaining how you feel about your role in the incident/event. It is a chance for you to talk freely about what the event meant to you and also an opportunity to describe the experience from your personal perspective. Your response should include emotions and should take us through your process, highlighting both how you felt while explaining your actions. Providing insight takes us into your process as a student and provides the admissions board with details about how you think.
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How do you understand the choice you made?
What informed the choice you made?
How do you understand your decision making process?
What do you know now that you didn’t know before?
How did this decision change you?
Personal Insight Questions
The University of California (UC) does not compare student to student; they look at each student’s individual experiences and environment. Freshman applicants must respond to 4 of the 8 Personal Insight Questions (PIQs) with a maximum of 350 words for each response. Students should select questions that are most relevant to their experiences and that best reflect their individual circumstances. All questions have equal value; there is no advantage or disadvantage to choosing certain questions over others.
The PIQs allow students to express who they are and what matters to them; they provide context for selection, scholarships, gaps in education, etc. Most UC campuses don’t conduct interviews or accept letters of recommendation; this is the student’s opportunity to highlight their achievements and experiences, as well as what they can bring to their campus community.
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​Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
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Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
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What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
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Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
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Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
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Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom. ​
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What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
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​Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you a strong candidate for admission to the University of California?
PIQ Do's
Provide Evidence
Must be specific (a direct quote from someone, a date, the score of a game, the name and title of the person featured in the story) and relevant (proves that you have executive function, resilience, and/or passion).
Use "I" Statements
Talk about yourself so that they can get to know your personality, talents, accomplishments and potential for success. Use "I" and "my" statements in your responses.
Write Persuasively
Expand on a topic by using specific, concrete examples to support the points you want to make. Making a list of accomplishments, activities, or awards will lessen the impact of your words.
Proofread and edit
Although you will be not evaluated on grammar, spelling or sentence structure, you should proofread your work and make sure your writing is clear. Grammatical and spelling errors can be distracting to the reader and get in the way of what you're trying to communicate.
Get Feedback
Your answers should reflect your own ideas and be written by you alone, but others (e.g. Talent Search Advisor, family, teachers and friends) may offer valuable suggestions.
Copy and Paste
Once you are satisfied with your answers, save them and paste them into the space provided in the application. Proofread once more to make sure no odd characters or line breaks have appeared.
Relax
This is one of the many pieces of information we consider in reviewing your application. Your responses can only add value to the application.
Be Direct
Students should be direct and intentional rather than descriptive. They are not looking for thesis statements. Rather, they seek focus and clarity; a direct response to the question.
PIQ Don'ts
Plagiarize
Ask advice of whomever you like, but do not use ideas or content from print or online sources. Use your own ideas and words.
Use Creative Writing
Avoid clichés, poems, haikus, scene-setting, quotes or jokes. They want the student to write about their creativity rather than submitting a creative writing sample. They want to hear the students' everyday voice, so students should use language that reflects who they are.
Use Quotations
Space is limited, and they want to know your thoughts and words, not someone else's.
Write about other people more
It's great to have family support or a loving friend or role model, but your responses to the personal insight question should be about you.
Repeat Information
Give us a new information they can't find in other sections of your application.
Give Long Lists
Place them in context with explanations or examples. Thoughtfully describe what you've done, the choices you've made and what you've gained as a result.
Pose Philosophical Questions
Get to the point and tell them what you mean. These responses should be direct rather than abstract and philosophical.
Use Acronyms or generalities
Spell it out for them, don't assume they know the acronym. If they don't know what the acronyms are, your meaning may be lost. Stick to facts and personal examples.
Re-stating prompts/titles
It takes away from available word count so students do not need to do so.
PIQ Responses should prove that you have executive function (you saw a problem and fixed it without being told to), resilience (you got knocked down, changed strategies a bit, then got back up and kept going), and
passion (you are driven to do certain things by an internal motivation).
Tips for Writing Effectively
"Becoming a Master Student", 14th edition by Dave Ellis under Wadsworth Cengage Learning.
Phase 1: Getting Ready to Write
Schedule and list writing tasks.
You can divide the ultimate goal into smaller steps. Estimate how long it will take to complete each step. Start with the date your paper is due and work backward to the present.
Do initial research.
Gain an overview of the subject. Discover the structure of your topic-its major divisions and branches.
Choose a topic.
Using your instructor's guidelines for the paper or speech, write down the list of possible topics and narrow your topic.
Outline.
Brainstorm ideas you want to include in your paper. Collect your ideas into separate groups, each group representing one major category.Finally, arrange the ideas in a logical order.
Write a thesis statement.
A thesis statement is different from a topic. A thesis statement makes an assertion or describes an action. "Careers in STEM" is a topic. "Careers in STEM are paving the way to the future" is a thesis statement.
Do in-depth research.
Write ideas, facts or quotations per paragraph. When you are ready to create the first draft of your paper or presentation, just move the paragraphs around so that they fit your outline.
Consider your purpose.
Think about how you'd like your reader or listener to respond after considering your ideas. Do you want your audience to think differently, to feel differently, or to take a certain action?
Phase 2: Writing a First Draft
Gather your notes and outline.
To create your draft, gather your notes and arrange them to follow your outline. Then write about the ideas in your notes.
Use free writing.​
There is only one rule in free writing: write without stopping. Set a time limit (e.g. 10 mins) and give yourself permission to keep writing. Ignore the urge to stop and rewrite, even if you think what you've written inst very good.
Ease into it.
Ease into the task with activities that help you generate ideas. You can free associate, cluster, meditate, daydream, doodle, draw diagrams, visualize the event you want to describe, talk into a voice recorder- anything that gets you started.
Make writing a habit
Schedule a block of time to write your first draft. The very act of writing can breed inspiration.
Remember that the first draft is not for keeps.
Your goal at this point is simply to generate lots of material. The idea is to avoid stopping to edit your work. You can save that for the next step.
Respect you deep mind.
Many people report that ideas come to them while they are doing something totally unrelated to writing. You can trust your deep mind. It's writing while you eat, sleep, and brush your teeth.
Speak it.
To get ideas flowing, start talking. Admit your confusion or lack of clear ideas. By putting your thoughts into word, you'll start thinking more clearly.
Get physical.
While working on the first draft, take breaks. Go for a walk. Speak or sing your ideas out loud. From time to time, practice relaxation techniques and breathe deeply.
Phase 3: Revising Your First Draft
Plan to revise a paper two or three times.
Schedule time before you begin, and schedule at least 1 day between revisions so that you can let the material sit. Consider seeing your instructor, or ask other people to review your paper.
Format your paper.
Format your paper following accepted standards for margin widths, endnotes, title pages, and other details. Ask your instructor for specific instructions on how to cite the sources used in writing your paper. Be sure to cite your work.
Avoid unnecessary words.
For maximum efficiency, make the larger cuts first- sections, chapters, pages. Then go for the smaller cuts- paragraphs, sentences, phrases, words. Stay within the word limit that your instructor assigns.
​Proof.
​​​Look for a clear thesis statement, sentences that introduces your topic, guide the reader through the major sections of your paper, and summarize your conclusions. Look for
details, such as quotations, examples, and statistics- that support your conclusions.
Look for consistency.
Look for consistency within paragraphs and for transitions from paragraph to paragraph and section to section.
Look at individual words and phrases.
Define any terms that the reader might not know. Also, use the active rather than the passive voice.